Navigating the non-believers

Photo: The Image Takers

January is ripe for lots of ‘new me’ — new goals and new resolutions for the year ahead.

If you’re energised by this, it’s a wonderful time to be alive. The hope and happy vibes are contagious.

I love to talk about goal-setting and will look for any opportunity to dive into these conversations.

But what happens when your partner, your bestie, or your work wife doesn’t really ‘believe’ in setting goals? What if it’s not their thing?

How do we navigate this so that they don’t bring us down, or hold us back from being our best self and making our goals and resolutions happen?

Different approaches

My husband approaches his goal setting in a very different way to me.

Sometimes it’s quite jarring for obsessive-organised-colour-coordinated-Rebecca to co-exist with someone who doesn’t want to write down, or sometimes even verbalise, every plan for the next 10 years.

You know what I’ve learnt? That’s OK, because he absolutely supports my approach, and when it comes to the big picture our plans are aligned. It’s our processes that are different.

I believe wholeheartedly in surrounding yourself with positive people who will support, challenge and encourage you, but that doesn’t mean doing things in exactly the same way.

When people are negative

Things are a bit different though when you’ve got a bestie (or other significant person) who doesn’t want to think about the future, or perhaps believes so strongly that the universe will provide that they find goal-setting foolish, and think you are for bothering.

We must ask ourselves if these people are still those that we want to confide in, share our own goals, or engage in productive conversations?

If the answer is yes, that’s fabulous. If not, we must make a call to take our good-goal-vibes elsewhere.

Live and let live

I’ve talked before about how you can’t slap a Nicorette patch on someone’s arm and expect them to quit smoking. Likewise, we can’t force others to engage in a conversation that they don’t want to. It’s OK for them to be a non-believer, just as it’s OK for you to follow your own path.

What’s not OK is to use someone else’s non-belief as an excuse for your inaction.

Let’s not be evangelists, let us instead run our own races. They can take their path, now you take yours and make your goals and resolutions come to life this year.

If you’re keen to set goals and want to make sure you have the money to bring them to life, get in touch for a chat.